Friday, December 3, 2010

Not Around the Holidays

I love my job...most days...

Sometimes though, it is just more than I can handle. I just don't get why God does the things He does...

Like, take babies away from their mommies and daddies around the holidays...

I have worked many a holiday - it is just part of being a nurse. You know that you have to work holidays because it isn't like a hospital can close for the day...and I have seen many a baby pass at this time of year.
It never gets easier for me. It adds to my stress and dislike of the holidays. I think when I get to Heaven I am going to sit with God and pick his brain as to why He does some of the things He does. What was He trying to teach all of us??

I had one of these kinds of days this week. I had the privilege of taking care of one of our antepartum patients more than once. I got to know her and her family a bit over the past week. So of course when it was time for her to deliver I volunteered to be her nurse. I wanted to be there to support her and to be one of the first to welcome her little girl. We knew the baby was going to need surgery and would transfer to the NICU. Our hospital is unique in that it is connected to a Children's Hospital through an underground tunnel. It makes taking care of babies easier for we have access to expert staff and are able to make seamless transfers. Patients are also able to visit the baby while both are still hospitalized.
The family mentioned that they didn't have a camera that day. I offered to let them use mine and then print the pictures on our little printer. They seemed a little surprised that I'd offer that but I wanted to meet as many of their needs that I could. I knew that the baby wouldn't be staying with us in the recovery room so I wanted to be sure they captured as many pictures as they could. Smiles were had and tears were shed in the operating room when we heard the first newborn cries.

As I cared for my patient those first hours after the delivery we heard an overhead emergency page. She looked at me and asked if that was for her baby. I could honestly say I didn't know for I didn't know what room her baby was in...but in my gut I knew that things were probably not going well.
I knew that I had to figure out a way to get my patient over to the children's hospital to see her baby.
I rarely take a mom over while she is still on a gurney - fresh from surgery...but I feel it is important for parents to see and love their baby while it is alive so I did all that I could to get her over there.

I can't share all of the details of what it was like for my patient...
But for me, I think I did a good job. I provided for her needs, maybe even broke a few rules to allow her to see her baby, but I am so glad that I did...
I have thought so much about her and her little girl over the past few days.

I will continue to do my job, will continue to try and meet my patients needs ~ I may not always 'love it' ~ I know there will be days like this one where I go home in tears...I only wish it never happened, especially around the holidays...
Debbie

2 comments:

Dana said...

I just found your blog. My son was stillborn in June and it is nice to know that nurses think about us and the babies that have been lost after it has happened. The nurse I had the day I found out Jacob had died came in my room and hugged me just after I was admitted, which helped alot. She told me that she thought about me that night when she went home and she came to see Jacob and I the next day (shortly after he was born). It meant alot to me to know that and I just wanted you to know it too.

I'm sure that your patient will always remember you and your kindness. Letting her see her baby right after surgery was probably exactly what she needed.

rnraquel said...

You do not know how much it means to the patient to be able to see her baby. I had a stillborn baby girl in 2008. I wrote about in in my blog at http://rnraquel.blogspot.com/2010/12/its-not-all-sunshine-and-lullabies.html
God bless you for what you do for these grieving parents.